Deshauna contested to become miss USA 6 times in 6 years and she lost all. At the 7th time, she made it for Miss Columbia and 6 months later in June 2016, she was crowned Miss USA, becoming the first USA Soldier to win that title. She says that life is full of nos and less yesses. But if you keep on track and focused, you will make it. Life has alot of set backs and pitfalls. They keep hindering us from reaching our destiny.
These set backs picture our future plans and dreams with “you can’t make it.” Such voices sound louder in your quite moment than anything else. They paint the life we desire to live with darkness that you cannot easily see any light/hope ahead; i mean success at the end of your planned endevours.
Every time you are alone, the devil will always whisper and remind you vividly about your life failures. It’s when you start recalling how you failed here and there. You start looking at yourself indeed as a real failure. You realize how you are weak or useless even when deep in your heart, you feel another contradiction that you are wise and sharp. You could have had a number of failures in relationships. You could have aborted a number of times. You could have lost a number of opportunities. You could have gotten retakes as if you are maliced by lecturers. You may have lost your beloved parent(s) who believed in you.
You may have grown with a life full of struggles. Every term from childhood and now every semester, you do exams after paying fees on the last minute. You have strugglrd nearly in everything. You are not alone. I too grew up in such circumstances and thought almost the same way. But because I trusted God and I were focused, I have conquered the past and the rest is history. Everything seemed to be working negatively against me in life every day. But God was always on my side.
Tears could be your daily bread. Rejection has been like your second choice. Hell has been near you. You could be sitting a retake and you were meant to graduate 2 years ago yet every semester you resit that paper(s), you fail it/them. You have done a number of interviews and even told you passed well and wait for your appointment letter and this never come true. You get a job before the expiry of 6 months’ probation or contract, you are shown the exit. Others it could be bad bosses that have made their lives harder. You are at the verge of giving up. You think you are alone in that battle. My brother/sister dont quit. Life can never be so open and straight in line with our desires and dreams.
Don’t lose your ambitions, dream, plans, name them. We learn from experience and past mistakes. The problems we go through daily should become our stepping stones. Deshauna says that “don’t fear failure but please be terrified of regret.” What I like about her speech is to keep working, no quitting, keep going back. There are so many shut doors at the time of your victory. But our victory comes from God who makes a way when no one expects it.
God knows everything about you and He is in charge. In fact, He knows the number of hair on your head. Jesus said that we are of more value than many sparrows (Luke 12:7). Get back to your roots, refocus this year 2020 and determine to think positively that whatever comes, whatever it takes you will make it. Be deliberate to make a better life for yourself. No one can do it for you.
What you need to do is to keep in a good group that encourages you. Have real friends that are ready to walk any journey with you and they are your pillars. Get a good mentor that you can always confide in and share a lot. Mentors will guide you in your life and you will be successful. Don’t be defined by the past mistakes. Learn from them and carry on. Encourage yourself because no one else understands you better than yourself. Be realistic with your life and stay in your lane. Don’t compare yourself with others. This will always discourage you. Stay connected to God and He will stay connected to you (John 15:7).
The writer is a child advocate and a parenting coach